GRATUITOUS CROCHETED BIKINI COMMERCIAL.

The Becca bikini for only 59US$, available in white and sand colour.





For those more interested in content instead of superficial things, the damsel is Grace Boor.



MFBB.

SATURDAY NIGHT THE J. GEILS BAND, THE TRAGICALLY HIP, EUROVISION SONG FESTIVAL.

The J. Geils Band with Centerfold. From the 1981 album Freeze Frame.




Rockers from Worcester, MA. Formed in 1967. Still around, be it after a couple of hiccups.



The Tragically Hip with Springtime in Vienna. From the 1996 album Trouble at the Henhouse.





Canadian alternative rock band from Kingston, Ontario.



Then it's Armenia. The country I mean. Is there even a band called Armenia? (whatever).

Anyway, Armenia, the last entry for the Eurovision Song Festival 2016, WON BIG TONIGHT!!!!!!!!!!!!.

Uh, at Chateau Outlaw anyway:





This is Iveta Mukuchyan. She won. OK. For the jury composed of me, myself and I anyway. I don't have the foggiest idea what she sang about and I don't recall the melody, tune, lyrics whatever anymore but she definitely had the best legs!


Nite.


MFBB.

LIFE ISN'T FAIR.

That evening, Outlaw Mike, news junkie that he is, was reading HLN Online:


"The North Korean leader Kim Jong Un enjoys, together with his wife Ri Sol Ju, a concert at the occasion of the seventieth birthday of the Korean Worker's Party, the sole party allowed in the closed Asian country. A couple of servicewomen were allotted an honor place next to the dictator..."


Photo Reuters, but whatever....


QUE??? See those legs??


THOSE LEGS????

Ggggghhhhhh.....




MFBB.

INDISPENSABLE BBQ TIPS BROUGHT TO YOU BY LINDSEY PELAS!

Via Theo Spark:




I think it is safe to assume Miz Pelas will not pick up Sir Tim Hunt's cancer research. Neither, I fear, can we count too much on her to help solve SpaceX's Dragon problems.


But at least you now know how not to mess up the summer BBQ's!



MFBB.

RECOMMENDED READS: KURT SCHLICHTER'S "FOUR PIECES OF ADVICE FOR YOUNG CONSERVATIVE MEN."

Well, like Kurt said, here's some advice for young conservative men. Especially for those in Europe, have I got the attention of all three of yours? Yes? Okay then, via Townhall:

"So, though no fault of your own, you are a young conservative male coming of age in a time when the deck is so heavily stacked against you that it’s like Michael Moore was leaning on it. Sure, it’s entirely the fault of a liberal elite led by President Nine Iron and a culture that bought into its lies long before you were born, but suck it up. It isn’t an excuse for failure – you may have an uphill climb at a higher angle of incline than I did, but tough luck. I can’t make the environment for you any friendlier, but maybe I can share some insights that might help.

Now, this is targeted to straight conservative males from 18-25 not because of the inherent cisnormative racism your TA told you about but because that’s who I was. Those who identify as “women” are welcome to take what they can from it. Those who are gay, well, my gaydar is so bad anyway that my exceedingly hot wife is constantly telling me, “Wait, you didn’t know XXXXX was gay? How did you not know XXXXX was gay?”

For those of you who are quick on the uptake, the key takeaway from that last paragraph is that I have an “exceedingly hot wife.” For that reason, if no other, you should listen to me. We’ll discuss relationships down the line. But first:

1.) Join the Army

Or the Marines, or the Navy, or Coast Guard, or even the Air Force, if you swing that way. I’m not judging. The point is, you should do a tour if you are one of the 30% of Americans who can qualify for military service. It will change your life, and enroll you in a true fraternity, one of men (and women) of extraordinary character and commitment that puts into perspective the cute, childlike Delta Cappa Whatevers and their bizarre paddling rituals.





This is what a Real Man may look like. Okay, it don't look like he just watched a Palace Flophouse production. He prolly just learned that Obama's new Secdef is pushing for nudists to serve openly, or some such.



When you earn a place in the ranks of those who defend our country, it may well be the first thing you ever really earned. There’s no helicopter mommy to complain to the drill sergeant that he needs to be more understanding of your delicate nature. There are no excuses of any kind. You will have earned something that is totally yours and can never be taken away – and you will live a life adventure that your contemporaries who are now second assistant to the guy who runs the Xerox machine can only dream of. Plus, chicks dig it. Trust me.


2.) Think Carefully Before You Go To College

If you aren’t already through college, why are you wanting to go? Understand that college is, to a significant extent, a scam. Hey, maybe you will get lucky and go to a place like Hillsdale where the word “education” isn’t a synonym for “drunken four-year vacation surrounded by petty fascists,” but the odds are against you. College was a huge help to me back in the 80’s, when a bachelors at UC San Diego didn’t mean I’d still be paying off debt out of my Social Security checks. I got to write humor, edit a conservative paper, and work on Capitol Hill, plus I have a lifetime of stories about my beer-fuelled adventures. Notice how none of that has to do with actual classes?

Consider living your life instead. If you really want to go to college, it can wait until you’ve lived a little. Finish a hitch in the service. Get a job. You’ll then be able to make the most of your investment. I did law school after my first tour, and paid much of it with the GI Bill. I was prepared for class every single day, while everyone else showed up nursing hangovers. Sure, I was hungover too, but I was prepared, damnit, because I was three months out of a war zone and officers didn’t show up unprepared.

Unfortunately, you do need a bachelors to do certain things, like go to law school. And on that note, don’t go to law school. Just trust me. Unless you want to spend your life making guys like me richer, take the money you’d borrow for it and not borrow it. Don’t go a quarter million dollars in debt so some name partner’s wife can get a pink Tesla to match her shoes. But if you do, let me know. I will appreciate your sacrifice, and so will my exceedingly hot wife.



3.) Pick a Career You Don’t Hate

You will be faced with the dilemma of choosing short-term money over long-term satisfaction. Don’t choose the money. I know liberals think we are all about money, but liberals know nothing or they would not be liberals.

Now, this notion is not some Millennial happy talk; it’s based on cold, hard reality. Life is too short to throw away doing something you hate, unless you incurred obligations and have no choice, in which case be a man and suck it up.

But, as a practical matter, if you hate it, you’ll do it poorly. And if you do it poorly you won’t rise. But if you love what you do – not always, and not every minute, but in general – you’ll focus on it and get better at it and, in the long run, you will succeed.

Hard work actually works. Sure, this economy sucks, and you can’t ride the crest of the Reagan wave of prosperity like I did, but then technology gives you opportunities and options I didn’t have starting out. Want to make a movie? Hell, you can get equipment for five grand that in the 1990s would have cost you a quarter million. Liberals want you to think there are limits, that you are trapped, that you can’t succeed. They lie.



4.) If You Want A Real Woman, Be A Real Man

Remember my exceedingly hot wife? You should, because your romantic relationship should be the cornerstone of your life and you want to get it right. Now, in a world of creepy feminists and whiny femboys, you need to understand that biology still trumps stupid social fads. Women want men. Not girly men. Not boys. Not manchildren. Men.

This is true of liberal women too, whether they admit it or not, but you don’t want one of them – well, at least for more than a few hours. Which reminds me – have an alias and use it.

The point is to avoid liberal women. If you see a chick hauling around a mattress, keep moving no matter how open to experimentation you hear she is. Do not become the lead in some daddy issue-plagued hysteric’s personal psychodrama.

You want a conservative woman. Ignore the liberal deniers – science proves that right wing women are hotter and sexier. Hey, conservatives don’t tend to have large families because they’re prudes. With liberal girls, a romantic interlude means a lot of sobbing about patriarchy, plus the vibe gets spoiled when you have to constantly stop to notarize affirmative consent forms.

There’s a lot of pressure on you young men to be passive and, frankly, wussy. Reject it. Call the girl. Don’t freaking text – texting is for the weak. Call her, like a man, and tell her what you want: “Hey, I want to take you out to [Quality Place] Friday. I want to pick you up at 7. You in?”

None of this lame, ambiguous texting crap: “Want 2 hangout w/ sum friends maybe sumwhere sumtime? LOL ;)”

Hang out, shmangout. Be a man and ask her on a damn date. She’ll be shocked, and pleased. Then open the door for her because you are a man and she’s a woman and men open doors for women whether the hairy-pitted, never-got-asked-to-the-prom crew from the local Womens’ Resource Center likes it or not.

Oh, and pay the check. Why? Because you are the man and I don’t care if she makes more than you. You asked her out, you’re the host. Pay the check.

And of course you should go out with a woman who asks you out. She’s got it together and knows what she wants. And if she asks you out and wants to pay, fine. But you still better open the door for her or I’ll smack you.

A date is an audition – you are auditioning her for the role of the woman you will spend the rest of your life with. If she’s cool, tell her, and tell her you’ll be calling her the next day. Then call her.

“Oh, Kurt, but she’ll think I like her and then maybe reject me!” Sheesh, that’s pathetic. Stop caring about rejection and start caring about not being a wuss who cares about rejection. Oh no, a chick didn’t like you! Trust me, you’ll find the strength to move on. And if you don’t, it’s only right and proper that your pathetic genetic line ends when you die alone in your mom’s basement.

Now, does my conservative advice work? Let’s review the key point here: “Exceedingly hot wife.” Any questions?

Got that y'all?

Okay, as a reward a pic of a Real Woman. A relatively exceedingly hot one no less!




Muslims are kindly requested to refrain from masturbating, lest their hands become pregnant.



MFBB.

GRATUITOUS LAW STUDENT PIC.

I'm tired of hatebeards on TV, on my computer screen, in the newspapers I read. AND I'm tired of their potato-bag clad women. Time for something else!




Islam has nothing to do with it! Enjoy!


MFBB.

MAITLAND WARD...

OW!




And a redhead no less! Dammit, I never in my entire miserable life dated a redhead! How I wish I had!


Uh.


Did I just say that out loud?



MFBB.

SCIENTIFIC STUDY ESTABLISHES ONCE AND FOR ALL THAT MEN LIKE LOOKING AT BREASTS.

DowneastBlog usually is on top of all things scientific, and it's no different this time. Sarah Gervais of the University of Nebraska-Lincoln has the goods:

"The eyes don't lie: Men really do look at women's bodies more than their faces, according to a new study that used eye-tracking technology to prove what many women have long observed.

But it's not just men who do it -- the study found that women look at other women's bodies, too.

"We live in a culture in which we constantly see women objectified in interactions on television and in the media. When you turn your own lens on everyday, ordinary women, we focus on those parts, too," says lead author and social psychologist Sarah Gervais of the University of Nebraska-Lincoln.

"Until now, we didn't have evidence people were actually doing that to women's bodies," she says. "We have women's self-reports, but this is some of the first work to document that people actually engage in this."





The participants – 29 women and 36 men – were outfitted with the eye-tracking system, which measures in milliseconds how long the eyes are fixed on certain spots. Their gazes reacted to photographs of the same 10 women, each with three different digitally manipulated body shapes – curvaceous, much less curvaceous and in-between. (Only women's bodies were viewed by study participants.) Both sexes fixed their gaze more on women's chests and waists and less on faces. Those bodies with larger breasts, narrower waists and bigger hips often prompted longer looks.

The explanation may be partly evolutionary, Gervais says, since men may be drawn to more shapely women for childbearing -- while women may be checking out their competition, she suggests.





And the study, published today in the journal Sex Roles, also finds that even when men are told to focus more on evaluating a woman's expressions and personality, women with more curves get more positive personality ratings.

Researcher Kun Guo, who also uses eye tracking in his studies at the University of Lincoln in the United Kingdom, says the technology provides "more objective measurements" than do questionnaires, which are subjective.

"The beauty of eye movements is that it is more difficult to inhibit," he says.

Jamie Lynn Goldenberg, an associate professor of psychology at the University of South Florida in Tampa, says there's been a lot of research on self-objectification, but only recently has attention turned to perceptions by others. She hasn't used eye-tracking in her studies but says it's "an interesting way" to look at objectification, which amounts to viewing women as objects.






"We have new methodologies for studying these things -- getting into the eyes of the perceiver," she says. "It doesn't explain why they're looking, but they're looking longer."

.................


Uh...

... did you just say something, Prof Gervais?



MFBB.

EARTHQUAKE EXPERIMENT.

There's an awful lot to report ot there, what with the EU's deepening financial woes, yet another Belgian government fallen, the War on Islam etc... but before we get to that, it's time for a little experiment of our own. I'm sure most of you heard of this:

BOOBQUAKE DETERMINED TO PROVE CLERIC WRONG.

A ONE-WOMAN mission to prove breasts don't cause earthquakes has swollen into a shirt-straining global movement preparing for the inaugural "Boobquake". Iranian cleric Hojatoleslam Kazem Sedighi angered womens' groups around the world on Monday when he claimed that promiscuous women were responsible for literally making the earth move.

"Many women who do not dress modestly ... lead young men astray, corrupt their chastity and spread adultery in society, which (consequently) increases earthquakes,'' Sedighi said. "What can we do to avoid being buried under the rubble?'' he asked during a prayer sermon on Friday. "There is no other solution but to take refuge in religion and to adapt our lives to Islam's moral codes.''

Now, there was this student, Jen McCreight, who, upon hearing this, decided to test Sedighi's theory:

"... Sedighi claims that not dressing modestly causes earthquakes. If so, we should be able to test this claim scientifically. You all remember the homeopathy overdose?

Time for a Boobquake.

On Monday, April 26th, I will wear the most cleavage-showing shirt I own. Yes, the one usually reserved for a night on the town. I encourage other female skeptics to join me and embrace the supposed supernatural power of their breasts. Or short shorts, if that's your preferred form of immodesty. With the power of our scandalous bodies combined, we should surely produce an earthquake. If not, I'm sure Sedighi can come up with a rational explanation for why the ground didn't rumble. And if we really get through to him, maybe it'll be one involving plate tectonics.

So, who's with me? I may be a D cup, but that will probably only produce a slight tremor on its own. If you'll be joining me on twitter, use the tag #boobquake! Or join the facebook event!"

Now, April 26 has come and gone and nothing much happened. Must be that they didn't try hard enough. That's why I thought of conducting a little experiment myself.


We start with an ex girlfriend of mine. I'm sure she doesn't mind her photo on DB. Science trumps privacy.





Then my secretary. She's a rather shy type but otherwise cooperative.





And now we come to the part where we really mean bizness. A former Miss Belgium:





SHAZAM! What do you think of THAT Hojatoleslam?

Okay, that does it for now. Mind you, I've always been a cautious type. Like a broken clock still gives the correct time twice a day, even Iraniun Holotojislamullahtollahs just may be right every now and then. But, If we're all alive and well come tomorrow, then that Sedighi dude theory SUCKS. Anyway, rendezvous tomorrow night, same time, dead or alive!



MFBB.

STUPID NEWS OF THE DAY.

A recent article in Dutch newspaper De Telegraaf:




Translation:

"MUSLIM SCRATCHES NAKED WOMAN OFF BILLBOARD.

From one of our correspondents.

AMSTERDAM- Amsterdam Police has recently had troubles with a pious muslim who scratches with his bare nails lingerie ads off billboards.

On the billboards, sexy ladies advertise for lingerie brand Sapph. The man, Tarix Abdullah, says that he acts "out of respect for God". He says he normally bears no grudges against women, but does indeed if they wear nothing more than a slip and bra. "I do it to protect the women and children who cross the street here. Soon women will think they have to dress like that to please men. If they follow God's way, more precisely the way of Islam, we can steer clear of the danger", Mr. Abdullah was quoted as saying.

Amsterdam police is aware of the action, but hasn't intervened yet. Sapph's ceo is "shocked"."

Duh. Steering women clear of danger huh. Another explanation might be that Mr. Abdullah wondered if, by scratching away certain items, he might not unearth the real thing. Anyway, over here at DowneastBlog, we absolutely have no problem whatsoever with women wearing only slips and bras. And to prove it we post the following pic:





THERE Mr. Tarix Abdullah!!! That will TEACH YOU!!!!!. Try to scratch that away!!!


MFBB.


P.S.: Downeastblog suggest Sapph for its female leadershi, uh, readership. Vandevelde is okay too.