Saturday, May 08, 2004

Morons, Evil Bastards, and Uncle Toms

As we discuss the rise of the political left over the last century, I feel compelled to talk about what I feel is one of their most brilliant achievements: their ability to characterize their ideological and political opponents. Over the years, those who have chosen not to follow the teachings of the left have been automatically placed by the media and liberal intelligentsia into three distinct categories: Morons, Evil Bastards and Uncle Toms.

The first and most popular classification for the great unwashed is of course, Morons. This group is reserved for those who just don't have the mental capacity to grasp the complexities and nuance of the liberal path. The left looks down on this group mostly with pity, although Morons that manage to rise to power receive the full brunt of liberal scorn. Those classified as Morons by the left include our current president, all NASCAR fans, all gun owners, and pretty much everyone who was in the first two thirds of the class to be picked for a team in gym class. Liberals would like to put all non-believers into this category, but some notable exceptions make it necessary to add two more.

The next category contains the Evil Bastards. This group is much smaller than the mass of Morons, and is reserved for those who clearly display a powerful intellect, but for some reason do not walk The Path. Personalities like Dick Cheney and Donald Rumsfeld fall into this group. While liberals would like to place these guys into the Morons club, they always seem to have intelligent, if insensitive and outrageous things to say, so it just wouldn't fly to call them Morons. What other explanation could there be for their behavior other than evil itself? The Evil Bastards are perhaps the most hated group of disbelievers, since they have the faculties to grasp the great tenets of Liberalism, but choose (how dare they) not to.

The last group is a special one that Liberals were reluctant to create due to their overwhelming compassion. However, tough times demand tough action, so here we have the Uncle Toms. The Uncle Tom's are people of color who normally would have been grouped into one of the other two categories, but due to the scriptures of political correctness, cannot be classified in such ways. Since it is immoral for liberals to criticize a person of color, the only explanation for these people's behavior is that they have been somehow confused or coerced into supporting the wrong side. This is an elegant solution, as any criticism of an Uncle Tom is automatically transferred to the Morons or Evil Bastards who corrupted him, which alleviates the Liberals of any guilty feelings about criticizing a person of color. Colin Powell and Condoleeza Rice are the most well known Uncle Toms, although their ranks are growing, much to the alarm and dismay of the liberal intelligentsia.

As you listen to liberal politicians pontificate or watch our left leaning media faithfully bring us the "news," notice how neatly they fall in line with this system. What better way to engage an opponent intellectually than to make them somehow instantly inferior, as if their opinion should be instantly discounted just because they didn't pass through this all-purpose liberal filter. Then you can pretty much say anything you want, since facts cease to become facts in the liberal universe when they come from Morons, Evil Bastards, and Uncle Toms.

Friday, May 07, 2004

Victor Davis Hanson gets it right yet again.
This clown needs a serious beating.

Wednesday, May 05, 2004

ME @ BOWDOIN [Jonah Goldberg]
May 11, Bowdoin college in Maine, 7:30 I believe. Be there or be not there, that is the question. But if you are there, we'll be there together.
Posted at 09:11 AM

Posted on NRO's Corner this morning, though the time is 7pm, not 7:30. This should be interesting. Jonah was telling me that some colleges entitle the talks "Give War a Chance" and such things. Can you even IMAGINE that at Bowdoin? BWAH, HAH, HAH!!!!!!

Yes, I'm gloating, we get to have a semi-private dinner with him before the talk, Tom and I, Scott, and about 5 other Bowdoin types that have helped to get this thing set up.

Lovin' it!

Here's more random thoughts from Thomas Sowell. There's more wisdom on this one page than in 99% of the books you will ever read.

Let's start a benevolent dictatorship tomorrow with Thomas Sowell as the supreme leader.

The Man!

Tuesday, May 04, 2004

Aaarrggghhhh!!!! That'd be only fifty-five kloms from me!!!

Meanwhile at Knack, the leading magazine in Flanders and self-acclaimed Champion of Objective News:


The title in bold, "BUSH MAG AFZWAAIEN" can be freely translated as: "BUSH CAN DISAPPEAR NOW."

The caption just underneath "De oorlog in Irak dreigt niet alleen Saddam Hoessein de kop de kosten" means "The war in Iraq threatens to cost not only Saddam Husayn's head."

The text in bold at the bottom of the page "Nog nooit heeft de wereld zo verlangd naar het einde van een presidentschap, als naar dat van George W. Bush" reads "Never before the world has longed that much for the end of a presidency as for that of George W. Bush."

From the March 24, 2004 excrement, erm, issue.

It was a fertile spring, here are some more pearls of wisdom:

* Massud Barzani quote "Our confidence has been used up" in bold, article copied from Der Spiegel, March 24
* Abu Bakar Bashir quote: "I pray that Allah will destroy the US", interview of Knack correspondent Alexander Weissink in Jakarta with said gentleman. Header in fat bold capitals., April 14
* From the same interview: "The Americans are very good in cheating people.", in bold
* Another article in the same excrement, erm, issue: "The criminal in George B. Junior", with a kindly provided link to

And, surprise, surprise: there was an article about Afghanistan in the April 2001 excrement, erm, issue: interview with Prez Karzai. Copied from Der Spiegel, of course. Apparently things must be going rather well in Afghanistan, since the article starts with:

"Three years is little for a country that since 1979 has been in war with itself. In october 2001 NATO-troops - together with armed Afghan opposition groups - chased the Taliban from power. Since then apparently much has turned for the better. A Loya Jirga, a grand gathering of clan leaders, chose a transitional government and a Head of State: Hamid Karzai (46)."

I really like the excerpt "In october 2001 NATO-troops ... etc... chased the Taliban from power". Whaaaaw, NATO-troops!!! From what country would they have been??????? I'm clueless ya know, since the article DOES NOT MENTION WHATSOEVER where this mystery army came from. France? Iceland? Norway? Turkey? Luxembourg??? Could it have been...... Belgium???????? Help me, does anyone know more???

Happy thoughts to you.

Posting from a hideout somewhere deep in the Ardennes, chased by the Belgian State Security and Islamic Relgious Police from Schaarbeek (Brussels), as always, your friend, Michael the Infidel.
I'm off the blog again for a bit, having surgery on Thursday to take out my right ovary and a "mass" that is attached to it.

Be grateful that you are men!

(Excepting you Jamie of course.)

Monday, May 03, 2004

Kerry 'Unfit to be Commander-in-Chief'

"We have 19 of 23 officers who served with [Kerry]. We have every commanding officer he ever had in Vietnam. They all signed a letter that says he is unfit to be commander-in-chief,"

Here's an idea: Instead of listening to people talk about the economy, jobs, and education who have spent their entire careers sheltered from the real world, let's talk to someone who is ultra successful in the real world. The CEO of Intel has a few ideas about outsourcing, the economy, etc. I put more weight behind what this guy has to say on this topic than the entire House and Senate combined.