Thursday, November 13, 2008


To counter the rising unemployment numbers, the Prez-Elect has announced a dramatic increase in the size of the gubbermint. The number of people in public service has to be doubled. Qualified people are sought. Feeling qualified myself, I filled in the form and submitted it. I am of course no American but since Obami himself is Kenyan I didn't think that would be a problem. I received an email from Bernardine Dohrn, newly appointed US Labor Secretary albeit with execution experience, with the following questionnaire attached.

That did not go too well. For instance:


In April 2004, I sent an email to a friend of mine in which I described how utterly ridiculous I had received the speech of some upstart fella from the City of Dope or something. I flunked 13.


Ouch. I also flunked 10. I guess it won't do much good to point out that the list of aliases I used on the net is mercifully short, just MFBB and Outlaw Mike. Evil tongues say that these aliases are in fact the two parts of my split personality, the former being the one that is mad as a hatter, the latter the one that is criminally insane. Whatever.


I don't keep diaries. People who write diaries and too many biographies are narcissistic wussies. Hey, that rhymes! Flunked.


Are you nuts????? I have illegal immigrants swarming all over the place!!! Hell, I married one! F-L-U-N-K-E-D.

To cut a long story short, I busted all 7,562 items on the General Extended Shortlist for Trustworthy Audacious Personnel by Obama (GESTAPO). Obviously, I'm not the one he's been waiting for.



No comments: